- Sympathy. Ever have a day when you just don’t think you can live another second without pity? Your solutions is spelled TBI. Never again will you be one-upped for the “biggest sob story” contest. You hold the trump card, my friend. Use it wisely and often.
- A great excuse–for everything. Forgot your homework? Too weak to shovel your walk? Didn’t feel like having the same conversation with your spouse for the umpteenth time? No problem. You have a brain injury. Your days of needing a dog to blame for eating everything are gone.
- Money. You’ll never need a job again now that you get government disability! Your days of earning dollars by the sweat of your brow are happily over. Find your dream home and enjoy early retirement. Now your only decision left is, tent city or trailer park–just hope you have a rich relative that can spare you some money to buy a tent!
- More time at home. Are you tired of the go, go, go and ready for a little downtime at home? Traumatic brain injury may be the right choice for you! No more sixty hour work weeks, no more commuting, no more hustle. In fact, with a little luck you may hardly leave the house again!
- Attention. Have you been ignored too much for too long? Do you find yourself wishing you had a servant, or at least a maid? Look no further. With a TBI, you may never clean a again! In fact you may be free of many of those tasks that are mundane and downright ordinary. Being hand fed, bathed, wiped, and moved from place to place–life doesn’t get much better than that. Even the most spoiled baby will be green with envy from all the attention you will command.
Why wait? Demand a brain injury today! You’ll hardly be able to believe the dramatic change it will bring to your life in such a short time!
Humor is the best medicine 🙂
*In full disclosure, my husband is the one with the Brian injury, not me.