The First 3 Years of Marriage

The first three years of marriage were sheer bliss. Okay, not without a few arguments, adjustments, and disappointments, but pretty much sheer bliss (I’ll hopefully talk more about these years later). I highly recommend having time with just the two of you before you have kids, in case anyone is wondering. I remember just a few months after getting married, telling Ricardo that I would have been a lot less stressed about marrying him if I had known how good it was going to be, haha. That was the absolute truth too. Yeah we did unemployment, living with family (my family, so it was easy for me :)), moving, school, job changes, and miscarriages–which for me was the hardest thing those first few years. But our marriage was solid. And we grew closer and closer. We discovered our best place to solve problems was the bed…I know what you’re thinking, and well, that was good too, but mostly we realized that if we were cuddling while we were working through things, the physical contact tended to relieve the tension. I think one of the real strengths of our marriage is that we have very similar ways of expressing and receiving love (love languages as some would call them), and we are both physical for sure, so cuddling has been our saving grace. But mostly, those first 3 years were filled with tons of time together, just the two of us, bonding and developing a deep, true, committed love…a love that has gotten us through the last two years.

One of my favorite things we did frequently the first few years (especially the first year) was go to the temple frequently. It was there that our spiritual relationship developed (at least from my perspective, that is how I see it). It was there that our relationship became sacred to me. My favorite thing to do was temple sealings (marriages, and family uniting, performed on behalf of the dead). I remember some very powerful moments, doing sealings, where Ricardo was across from me, and the look on his face was of pure love. The room was full of light, but it seemed as if Ricardo and I were full of light and joy as well. In those moments I believed Ricardo and I were going to be married forever. I believed our family was eternal. I believed all the beautiful promises that were made to me in the temple about becoming like God, about becoming a God, with him. It was amazing, perfect, profound, and extremely sacred to me. And I never wanted what we had in those moments to end, ever.

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